Sunflowers in a box
by Al-meow
Summary: Matthew is sixteen and loves Ivan with all his heart. Ivan is his everything and Matthew would do whatever his beloved says. But Matthew's small world is about to shaken up. Human!AU.CanadaXRussia Rating may change.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N This is my first fanfic in years. Hope its okay.  
>Summary: Matthew is sixteen and loves Ivan with all his heart. He can't remember any time he wasn't with him. Ivan is his everything and Matthew would do whatever his beloved says. But Matthew's small world is about to shaken up. Human!AU.<strong>

**Disclaimer: I don't own Hetalia. **

Sunflowers in a box

Chapter 1

I've lived with Ivan for as long as I can remember. He told me that my old caregivers weren't nice and hurt me so he took me away from them. He's been taking care of me since.

My days are pretty normal.

I'm almost always the last to wake up in the morning. Ivan is never still asleep when I open my eyes. It usually takes me a little while to get out of bed. Ivan and I sleep in the same bed most of the time. I have my own room but I don't use it unless he tells me we can't sleep together that night.

I go down stairs to greet everyone. The others are always cooking breakfast by the time I get up. Ivan is usually sitting at the table watching them. He wants to make sure they're safe and not messing up the food. One time Ivan told me that browned haired one tried to poison me. So I'm happy he watches them. I don't know why the others would want to hurt me. I've never done anything to them.

"Good morning Ivan." I said, kissing him on the cheek. He looked up at me and smiled. "Good morning мой подсолнечника." Ivan doesn't let the servants call me by anything other than Sir. I don't like it. It makes me sound old. I wish they'd call me Matthew, or something else.

He pats his lap signaling me the sit down. I don't know why, but the brown haired servant always looks worried and uneasy when Ivan is touching me.

"мой подсолнечника looks very pretty today." He said placing him lips on my neck.

I giggle "You say that every day." Ivan just smiles and tightens his hold on my waist.

The taller blonde servant placed the meal on the table. I slip out of Ivan's lap and into the chair next to him.

Breakfast was quiet. The servants don't speak much when Ivan and I are in the room together. They always look scared and nervous, it's weird.

After that, Ivan and I go to take a shower. I don't really take showers without him. Most of the time it's just a normal way to get ready for the day.

"Matvey, are you alright? You look worried." Ivan asked me, while drying off afterwards.

"Nothing's wrong. Just thinking, that's all." He rubbed the towel on my head to dry my hair and then took started brushing my hair. Ivan likes to brush my hair, and puts in a little ponytail a lot. "Matvey, you are so cute." He rubbed my shoulders and back.

"Ivan, Stop." I giggled. Ivan was very touchy and loved to hug me and rub my back and neck. It feels nice but sometimes I get sick of it. But I never tell him.

After getting dressed Ivan and I often go to the store to pick up whatever we need. Today is one of these days. There's a small quiet town a short walk away from the house. I love walking with Ivan. It's one of the highlights of my day.

We get to the small market in the town and enter the store. The owners there know Ivan and they talk about how things are. I don't like talking in public because I'll say something wrong and the person will give me a very worried look. I don't know why. Ivan doesn't like me to talk either because there is a lot of things I can't talk about outside the house.

So, I mainly just listen. The owners are an elderly couple and are very nice. The woman talks to me like a kid which makes me kind of mad.

We go down the aisles and pick up everything we need. Ivan lets me pick out a treat from the sweet aisle. I was standing there trying to pick something when this young woman comes close to me.

I don't like to be alone without Ivan. He had gone down the other way and this woman being close to me without him to protect me was scary. I chose a treat quietly and tried to follow Ivan and ended up dropping the things I was carrying. The young woman looked over at me and picked it up.

"Here you go." She said with a smile. I quietly took it out of her hand. "I see you and the other man all the time in the store but never in town. Do you live close by?"

Oh no! She was talking to me. I looked around for Ivan. He was nowhere it sight.

"Um…We…live... away from the town." I whispered. She leaned in closer to hear me.

"Is he your brother or father? He looks way too young to be your father." She continued to ask questions.

Ivan had told me not to answer questions about our relationship because he said not everyone will like it. I looked around fearfully;

I could feel my nerves taking over. "You two kind of stand out. How old are you?"

Tears started building up in my eyes as the stress starting to go up and up and I started shaking.

"Matvey." My savior had come. I run and hid behind him, trying to cover how much I was crying. I was hoping he wouldn't be mad at the woman. She hadn't done anything wrong.

"I'm so sorry. I was just.." The woman tried to plead with Ivan. He's a big man and I'm sure she was scared. But Ivan smiled at her and pushed me away for behind him.

"No, I'm sorry. Matvey is just very sensitive and has a social disorder so it's very hard for him to talk to strangers." Ivan rubbed my back trying to calm me down a bit. The woman looked relieved.

"Oh. Okay, I'm sorry for scaring him. Hope you can forgive me." With that she walked away. Ivan's face darkened at bit. Was he mad at me? Did I do something wrong?

"I'm sorry Ivan." I sniffed. I hated it when he was mad at me. When I was little he would punish me for being bad and making him angry. "It's fine. I was just scared, you know I don't like people talking to you without me, мой подсолнечника."

"I know, she came up to me and started talking. It was scary." Ivan laughed at that as he paid the cashier for the food. I tried to pick up one of the bags but he took it before I could.

"That's too heavy for you. I'll carry the big things." He handed me the lightest bag and continued to walk to the door of the market. Ivan never lets me carry heavy things or do anything he thinks is "too much for me." I don't like it, I think I can do a lot of things if he'd let me. But I wouldn't argue with Ivan.

When we got home Ivan starts on his work. He works from home, I'm not sure what his job is, but he's always getting calls and signing papers so I know it's something important. I try to help him but he rarely lets me.

"мой подсолнечника, have you taken your pill today?" He asked while I was stapling some papers for him. I pouted and turned my head away from him.

"..Maybe." I hate taking the pills Ivan gives me. I've been punished before for not taking them. But that doesn't stop me sometimes.

Ivan put the pen down and pulled up out of his chair. He cupped my chin in his hand and pulled so I was facing him. "Matvey, you know you have to take it." He reached into his pocket and pulled out a small bottle. I continued to sulk but opened my mouth when told, and Ivan placed a small pill in my mouth.

"Now, let me finish my work." He went back to his desk and I sat on the couch in his office.

After a short time, Ivan rose from the grand desk and woke me out of my day dream. After Ivan was done with work it was time for lunch. The servants should be done with it by now.

I followed him downstairs and into the kitchen where the brown-haired one was almost done.

He smiled shyly at me but turned his face away when Ivan sat down.

"Toris, is there something the matter?" Ivan said with a smile. The servant tensed and turned away. "Answer me Toris." He said in a firm voice. The browned hair man jumped a little.

"No sir, I'm fine." He returned to the dishes as Ivan and I started to eat. I don't hate Toris but he confuses me. He's always nervous and seems stressed. The very few times Ivan leaves without me he tries to talk to me. Last time, he asked me if I'm okay and if I'm hurt. It's like what all of the people in the town do when they see Ivan and I. It's so odd, does Ivan look like he would hurt me.

Lunch was good today. But Ivan was looking at Toris working on the dishes the whole time. He watches the servants closely to make sure they don't mess up. The smaller one, Raivis, has a bad habit of breaking things and making a mess.

After lunch Ivan likes to read a bit. I try to read with him but the books are hard and long.

They make me really tired so I fall asleep. They are quick naps and Ivan just keeps reading. I wake up with my head in his lap, him running his fingers through my blonde hair. Even after waking up I stay there for a while.

We decide to take a walk outside in the snow. Ivan wraps his scarf around my neck to help keep me warm. "It's starting to warm up a bit." I said. The snow was slowly starting to lessen each day. I don't mind the cold but Ivan hates it. He gets sad every year when the first snow hits.

It was starting to get dark by the time we got back to the house. Ivan always goes to check that the servants did what they were supposed to do that day. I follow him around as he makes sure everything has been done. The servants line up at this time, all shaking and what-not. I don't understand why they are so afraid of Ivan. He wouldn't hurt anyone unless he had too.

Everything seemed to be in order, so we went off to have dinner. It was quiet and boring. I sat mostly playing with my food.

"I'm having some business partners over tomorrow evening and I want everything to go well. Understand?" His violet eyes rose towards the three servants, who seemed to move nervously in their seats. I frowned; guests meant I had to dress up and act as another servant.

Ivan doesn't want guests to know about how close we are so he has me act as another on of his servants. I have to dress up in a suit and serve his business partners who smell like smoke and cheap alcohol. They were all mean old man. One had mistaken me for a girl and had tried to cop a feel.

"Matvey, I know you'll behave tomorrow night." Ivan said, kissing my neck. I smiled and pushed my lips to his cheek as he wrapped his arms around my waist. The three young men rushed about the door when our lips met.

When we stepped in the bath, I sat on Ivan's lap as we relaxed in the warm water. "Matvey do you love me?" He asked in a low tone. He asked this every day, I think it's a game he plays. So I play along, smiling up at him.

To be continued.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N this is my first fanfics in years. Hope its okay**

**Summery: Matthew is sixteen and loves Ivan with all his heart. He can't remember any time he wasn't with him. Ivan is his everything. Matthew will do whatever his beloved says. But Matthew's small world is about to shaken up. Human!AU **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Hetalia **

Sunflowers in a box

Chapter 2

I was woken up rudely, being shaken out of a nice dream by the brown haired servant, Toris. I groaned and turned on my side, away from him.

"Sir, please I need you to wake up. Ivan said so." I yawned and sat up, still half asleep.

"Why didn't Ivan come wake me up?" I didn't like being woken up, even by Ivan, but at least he wakes me up with a kiss and a cuddle, not shaking me.

"He's busy getting ready for tonight. He asked me to come help you today." I could tell he wasn't happy that Ivan was making him do this. His face seemed more stressed then usual.

"Well, are you going to get up?" He said quickly. I wake up slowly; Toris must wake up really fast or he wouldn't be rushing me.

"I don't have anything on. Can you grab me some pants?"

Toris' face was pretty funny after I said that. He took some pants and a plain shirt out of my dresser. His face was all red when he handed them to me.

Downstairs, the other two servants were working hard trying to get the whole party ready. Ivan was no-where to be found. I really wanted to see him but Toris told me to eat my breakfast. I could tell the three were in a hurry because my meal wasn't as good. I could hear them whispering about something outside the kitchen.

"Why can't he bathe and dress himself? You should be helping us. If one thing is wrong tonight Ivan's going to be angry!" The taller one said.

"Ivan told me he can't do it himself." Toris says in his stressed voice.

"Who can't bathe and dress themselves at sixteen!" The small one said, shaking like always.

Were they talking about me?

"Ivan's been doing it for him for six years. Matthew has been taught by Ivan to be completely dependent on him. It's not Matthew's fault." Toris was looking down now, not meeting the eyes of the others.

I wasn't dependent on Ivan...was I?

I sank back in my chair. I don't know why but hearing that I was dependent on Ivan for everything made me gloomy. The more I thought about it, the sadder I felt. I was almost crying when Toris came in to help me into the bath.

This was awkward.

I had never been naked in front on anyone but Ivan. Toris didn't look at me much so I think he thought it was awkward too.

While soaping up my arm he stopped when he saw the small dark bruise on my wrist.

"What are these from?" his voice was small.

"These? Oh, they're from playing with Ivan, that's all." Why is he so weird? His eyes were filled with fear.

"Playing with Ivan?" his grip on my wrist got tighter.

"Yeah, we play all the time, after our bath." He was scaring me now. I pulled my arm away from him. "Can you hurry up? I want to get out of the bath."

He starting to rinse the soap off, but he didn't stop talking.

"How long have you and Ivan been playing?"

"I don't know, since I was fourteen." That was kind of true. When Ivan and I started he started me out by showing me how to play and then we worked it up slowly. I don't know why Toris was so upset. It's not like it hurts that much anymore.

Finally the bath was over and the servant dressed me in the outfit Ivan had picked out for me. Unlike the others who had black ones, I had a red vest and black pants. Ivan likes red on me and often makes me wear it.

Toris left me to go help the others so I went to try and find Ivan. He was in his office preparing for tonight.

"Ivan, I've been looking for you all day." He turned to look at him and smiled. I was so happy to see him, and ran up and hugged him. He laughed and picked me up, spinning me around. Ivan's lips pushed against my neck making me giggle a bit.

"I'm sorry I haven't gotten to see you today Matvey." Ivan said after putting me down. My arms were still wrapped around his chest, not wanting to let go. "I'm glad I picked that outfit out for you. It looks excellent." I blushed; I love it when Ivan compliments me.

"Ivan, can I ask you a question?" I tried not to look at him but direct eye contact was something Ivan demanded when you were talking to him.

"What is it мой подсолнечника?" Ivan's eyes staring down at me made me slightly nervous. I wasn't sure how he would take this.

"Why am I so weak and frail?" I didn't think it would be a nice topic, but after the others had said that, I was curious and worried about it.

"Oh Matvey, that's not your fault." Remembering what Toris had said this earlier didn't comfort me. Ivan patted his lap, telling me to come closer. I did, trying to hide how upset I was. "When I found you before, you were so tiny and thin that you looked sickly. Your caregivers must not have fed you."

I honestly didn't remember anything before living with Ivan. Everything before was a blank. It didn't bother me, nothing else mattered but him. I was happy here, I didn't need a past.

"These mean people did not pay any attention to you. When I first set my eyes on you, you were crying and alone out in the snow. Matvey was so small and pure then." Ivan snuggled my neck and smiled. "So I took you away from the bad people and brought you here with me." He pressed his lips to mine and pulled me closer. "I think such a horrible childhood affects your body and that's why you're weak and get tired easily."

That makes sense. Ivan was such a great man to take me in and away from those nasty people. I was scared to think about where I would be if Ivan had not taken me away. I owed him my life.

Ivan opened a drawer and took out a little box. It opened to show a little sunflower necklace with the words мой подсолнечника printed on the back. It was beautiful. Ivan took it out and placed it around my neck.

"I wanted something to show our bond. I thought this was perfect." He smiled at me. My heart sang and my face turned red. Ivan sent kisses up and down my neck and face. "мой подсолнечника is so cute." He said. Ivan looks at the clock; it was almost time for the guests to show up. I got up off his lap and Ivan stood up out of his chair.

"Make sure to hide that, I don't want any of my guest to think I favor one of my servants." He laughed and winked at me. "Run off and start playing servant." He patted my back and sent me downstairs to wait with the other three. I could feel the necklace on my chest. It made me happy.

The guests started to fill up the house. Most all of which were the old and creepy looking men. The bad part about Ivan's job is that he seems to only work with creepy, or old men.

The smell of alcohol was everywhere along with the muttering of people. Toris had probably given me easy things to do like carrying some trays and things. I was heading to a particularly crowded couch.

A thin, sketchy looking man surrounded by drunk men and women was talking a lot, and everyone around him was laughing. I was just standing there to refill the drinks when this man first said something.

"Well, aren't you a pretty one. Where'd Braginski get you? The slave market? A whore house? You look way too pretty to be just any servant." He said all of this with a smirk on his face which I didn't like at all. So I tried to ignore him but the man kept talking

"I mean to say, look at you! There's no way you're a good servant if you are one. You look so skinny that you'd break in half doing any manual labor. Plus look at these hands." The man grabbed on my hands away from the tray. "Soft and dainty. You look like you haven't worked a day in your life." He laughed along with the people around us.

My face turned red. Why was everyone laughing? I thought I was doing well at pretending to be a servant.

"You're very attractive if anything. That's probably why Braginski keeps you around, since you can't work. He always did have a thing for pretty, but useless things."

The man's words were hurtful. I tried to walk away but every time he called me back for another drink, he said something else painful and mean. A lot of the words he called me I had never heard before but they made everyone around him laugh. I pushed my way through the room to an empty hallway.

I didn't want Ivan to see me upset because I told him I'd behave. I started crying softly to myself. I thought I was alone but the man had followed me. Just great.

"Aw, sorry babe, did I make you cry?" he said in a mocking voice. He walked straight up to me face, too close for me. His hand reached around and pinched my rear. I gasped and pulled down on the wall. No one is supposed to touch me but Ivan.

"Let me make a deal with you. I'm going to ask your boss how much he bought you for and I'm going to buy you off of him."

Buy? What did he mean by that? Ivan didn't buy me, he saved me.

"I'll teach you your place and put your looks to good use." He touched my face and ran his fingers across my cheek. I didn't like this. I did not like the way the man looked at me or touched me. It was scary, and I wanted him to leave now.

"Please leave me alone sir." I said quietly, trying to get him to leave. He only laughed and his head drifted to the bottoms on my shirt and start undoing them.

"If you want I'll pay up front."

Suddenly a pipe came crashing down on the man's head and he fell to the floor in front of me. I turned to face the wall, afraid of the noise and sight. The sound of the lead pipe hitting bone and skin didn't stop and I kept my face turned away. I could hear begging. The man was begging for his life. It sounds completely different from the voice making fun of me minutes before.

The noise stopped.

"Shh, мой подсолнечника he's gone now. Don't look; I don't want you to see." I kept my eyes shut. "Toris, take our bad guest outside and clean this up. Tell the others it's time to leave." Toris made a dreadful noise as Ivan led me away from the hallway. He made sure I didn't run into anything with my eyes closed. When we get back to the room, Ivan asked for me to wait on the bed while he went to the bathroom. I opened my eyes, still really scared. Ivan came out of the bathroom. I ran up and hugged him, tears running down my face.

"There's no need to be afraid, Matvey. The evil man is gone now." He ran his fingers through my hair. I didn't move, keeping my face pushed against Ivan.

"Did...you kill him?" I managed to get out through the tears. Ivan's face darkened, and his hand stopped.

"Дa, мой подсолнечника, the man is dead. He won't try to hurt you again." For some reason this didn't make me happy. Tears were still coming out and I didn't want to let go of him.

We moved to the bed where Ivan wrapped me in his arms, kissing my neck and lips. The bottoms on my shirt were undone and his hands moved to my shoulder and back. It felt so excellent. Ivan was great at getting me to relax. I leaned into his chest, getting sleepy.

"Is Matvey okay now?" He kissed my cheek.

"Yes, thank you. Sorry you had to do that."

"I have to protect what's mine." He nuzzled my neck, making me giggle. I turned around to kiss him back on the lips, putting my arms around his neck. But Ivan pulled away.

"Do you love me, мой подсолнечника?" The game Ivan played everyone started again. I leaned my head on his shoulder.

"More then anything in the whole wide world. I own you my whole life."

Ivan looked so happy after I said that, and making Ivan happy makes me happy.

We both fell asleep like that.

To be continued

**Transition notes**

**Мой подсолнечника-My sunflower**

**Дa- Yes **


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N this is my first fanfics in years. Hope its okay**

**Summery: Matthew is sixteen and loves Ivan with all his heart. He can't remember any time he wasn't with him. Ivan is his everything. Matthew will do whatever his beloved says. But Matthew's small world is about to shaken up. Human!AU **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Hetalia **

Sunflowers in the a box

Chapter 3

The next weeks flew by. Ivan was in a great mood, I could tell because all he wanted to do was play and cuddle. It made me happy to spend so much time with him.

I woke up with Ivan still in bed for the first time in a long time. He was awake, looking down at me. He was smiling and stroking my head.

"Good morning, мой подсолнечника"

"Good morning Ivan." I smiled up at him. I loved waking up next to him. These last few weeks have been so much fun.

We showered and dressed, going down stairs for breakfast. Another thing that was happening in the last few weeks was Toris seemed even more worried and nervous, if that's even possible. Any time Ivan entered a room he would do his best to leave. It's gotten so bad that Ivan has had to punish him a lot for disobeying him.

During breakfast, Ivan stood up. "I have an important announcement to make today. I've been thinking and have decided that it's time for a change in setting. We're going to move to another house. Somewhere warm and pretty, away from the snow."

I liked the idea of moving. I had never been anywhere else and the way Ivan described the new house sounded amazing. He kept talking about how pretty it was and how it was surrounded by sunflowers. Eduard and Ravis both didn't seem unhappy, but Toris wouldn't look up at all. His eyes were set to the ground.

"I have to leave for a trip but when I get back we'll get working on moving. Any questions?" I hated it when Ivan went on trip. The house got lonely without him.

"How far away is this house sir?" Toris voice was shaking.

"Very far, it's away from all the snow." Ivan smiled, but it didn't seem to making Toris feel any better.

Ivan started packing so I just sat on the bed and watched him.

"How long are you going to be gone?" I said sadly, pouting at bit.

"Only two day. Not too long мой подсолнечника." He kissed my forehead.

Ivan was all packed and getting ready to leave. I followed him all day, wanting to be with him before he left. He didn't get annoyed; he understood how lonely I got when he was gone.

I was sitting on the couch when he came up to me. He sat down with me. "I have to leave soon Matvey." I sighed, upset, and pulled my legs under my knees. Ivan put his arm around my shoulders. "I know you'll be lonely without me but when I get back, we're going to move to the most beautiful place in the world." he cupped my chin and kissed my lips. The kiss deepened as he laid me down on the couch. His large hands moved up my shirt and touched all over my body. I moaned and leaned in to his touch. His mouth and lips had moved to my neck and shoulders. Marking me with his signs of love.

This was the first time Ivan and I had done it this outside Ivan's bedroom. It was weird but for some reason I thought it was nice. Ivan's other hand moved to my pants. I locked my lips to his. "Do you love me, мой подсолнечника?"

"More than anything, Ivan."

Afterwards, Ivan picked up his bags and walked out the door. I stood by the door watching his car drive away. I felt a hand on my shoulder-it was Toris. He did look more relaxed now that Ivan had left.

"Do you want me to make you something to eat Matthew?" He had said my name, it's the first time he had. For some reason, all throughout the day, Toris keep being strangely nice to me. He even read me a book I could understand, not one of the big ones Ivan read. Toris made me a funny dessert. He had it all the time when he was little. I realized that I didn't really know a lot about any of them.

"So, why do you work for Ivan?"

Toris looked up at me in shock. He was quiet for a few minutes. "You see, Eduard and Ravis and I lived in the same orphanage. This is where we got close, but when we got to be older they kicked us out. We ended up on the street. The three of us didn't have any money or food. It got to the point where we were going to have to do bad things to survive. Ivan found us and said he'd house and take care of us if we worked for him." Toris wouldn't look at me.

His life had been hard. I bet he's happy Ivan found him.

Toris started with the dishes while I pulled out a tiny bottle. I put the small pill in mouth.

"Matthew, you don't have to take that if Ivan's not here." Toris said, trying to take the bottle from my hand. I pulled my arm around and hid it behind my back.

"No, Ivan told me I have to take them. So you can't take them from me." How dare he try to stop me for doing something Ivan told me!

"Do you even know what these are for?" his voice was irritated.

"Yes, it's to help me from being weak." I was getting angry now. I wasn't dumb; I knew why I took my pills. Why wouldn't I?

The clock on the wall chimed. It was passed nine a clock and time for me to go to bed. I didn't bother saying good night to Toris. He was being mean and I didn't want to talk to him. I walked up to Ivan's room, which seemed bigger without Ivan in it.

I snuggled under the covers, the bed cold and empty without him. I hated sleeping alone, but after a while I fell asleep.

I was awakened by soft talking from out in the hallway. I slowly got up and opened the door. It's the middle of the night and the three were whispering about something.

"This is my last chance. If I wait till Ivan comes back, it'll be impossible to do." Toris said. They were all standing outside their rooms and they looked distraught.

"If it doesn't work, you know what Ivan will do to you. It's too much of a risk." Eduard seemed to be angry with what Toris said.

"I don't want to see how much farther things can go if I don't stop it soon." He seemed to have made up his mind.

Ravis was crying, and grabbed a hold of Toris's sleeve. "What if Ivan finds out it was you?"

"If it works, Ivan will never be anywhere near us again."

Were they talking about leaving? But Ivan saved their lives. Why would they do that? I stepped out of the shadows, scaring all three of them.

"Oh Matthew, we didn't see you there."

"What are you guys talking about?" the three sets of eyes didn't leave me.

"It's nothing sir. Just go back to sleep." said Eduard.

Toris walked over to me and placed his hand on my shoulder. "Why don't I get you something to drink to help you go back to sleep." He led me to the kitchen where he heated me up some hot chocolate. It feel really good going down, and it indeed made me sleepy. I rubbed my eyes and leaned back in my chair. Before I feel asleep right there, Toris led me back to Ivan's room and tucked me in.

"Ivan will be home tomorrow in the afternoon." I said sleepily. Toris was about to leave but stopped.

"I know..." with that he shut the door and I drifted off to sleep.

_I was standing to the middle of a field of sunflowers with Ivan. We were walking hand in hand. It was sunny and warm, just like Ivan liked it. There was nothing in sight but tall friendly sunflowers. Ivan stopped and turned to look at me. He said something but I couldn't hear him. He pulled me into his arms and kissed me. He pulled my necklace out of my shirt and played with it. _

_He nuzzled my neck and kissed my chest. We were both dressed in complete white. Ivan looks like an angel. He whispered something in my ear but again I could not make out what he said. _

_Suddenly, the blue sky went dark and the flowers around us all started slowly dying before our eyes. I tried to grab a hold of Ivan, but he disappeared. The ground below me broke, causing me to fall into darkness. Screaming and crying, I kept falling. _

I woke up with a start. I could hear a lot of footsteps, and things breaking. There were too many sounds. The three never made this much noise. Something caught my eye outside, something red and white.

Cars, lots and lots of police cars! There had to be at least 20 of them. From what I could see from the window Toris and the other two were outside talking to the police.

Why?

Ivan always told me to never talk to these people. They would take me away. Why were they here? I could hear more footsteps running down the hall to the room. I pulled the closet door open and hid inside. Ivan told me if anyone came into the house to hide. I was crying now. I love Ivan. I don't want to be taken away.

I could hear the door being crashed through.

I covered my ears.

_'Ivan, please help me!'_

To be continued.

Author's note-

The next chapter was halfway done a week ago. But my computer is broken at the moment (I'm on my Dad's laptop), and I'm pretty sure I'm going to lose all of my stuff on it. :( I'll try to write it soon.

Thank you for reading.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N this is my first fanfics in years. Hope its okay**

**Summery: Matthew is sixteen and loves Ivan with all his heart. He can't remember any time he wasn't with him. Ivan is his everything. Matthew will do whatever his beloved says. But Matthew's small world is about to shaken up. Human!AU **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Hetalia **

Sunflowers in a box

Chapter 4

I sat in the dusty closet, curled up into a little ball, crying and sobbing. I could hear things break, and a bunch of footsteps. They were getting closer to Ivan's room. I hear the door break into pieces and about six men pushed into the room. I was shaking, wishing Ivan was here to protect me, to comfort me.

"He isn't in here." One of the men said.

"The guy said he was in the room, keep looking."

"Try the closest."

Hearing that freaked me out. I started drawing myself deeper into closest. Light flowed into the small room and a man in a uniform peered inside.

"Oh. Looks like we found him. It's okay little guy you're safe now." He held out his hand for me. I didn't take it, and tried to hide in the long coats Ivan had. He pushed in to the closet and picked me up. I started fight back, kicking and screaming. Another man tried to grab me.

"It's okay, we not going to hurt you!" No. These man were going to hurt me, take me away from Ivan. I can't leave him!

The men pulled me downstairs and outside. That's when I saw Toris sitting in the wet snow. The men pulled me over to him.

"Can you help calm him down? He's going into a state of panic."

Trois took my shoulders and looked me in the eyes. For the first time Toris' eyes looked strong and forceful.

"Matthew, calm down. You need to stop crying."

I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Did Toris do this?

"It's okay, you're not in danger." He said calmly.

"You did this.. you betrayed us."

Trois' face changed. "You had no idea what was happening to you. I couldn't watch it anymore."

I tried to pull away and run back into the house but Toris grabbed my arm.

"Matthew, stop and think for yourself for a change. Do you really want to live the rest of your life locked in that house with a monster?"

"Ivan is not a monster, I love him!" I yelled. Why was Toris doing this? I was happy.

"All he's ever done is lie to you! Do you want to know all the lies you've been fed!" I had never seen Toris angry, he was screaming at me. The police were questioning the other two, but some looked over to us.

"He's lied to you about your past, he lied to you about these pills, you don't even understand what love is because of the man." There was so much hate and anger in his face.

One of the men came over to us and started to talk to Toris who was starting to get stressed. The things he said were running through my mind.

"No, it'll be fine, it's the only way he'll go without a fight." Were the last words I heard when a needle was pushed into my arm by Toris.

The world started going black and I felt myself falling.

"I'm sorry Matthew."

I woke up surrounded by light, white painful bright light. My eyes could finally see after a few minutes. I was in a hospital.

"Well, good morning sleepy-head!" A pleasant woman's voice rang out at me. I turned to see and a young brown haired woman in a nurse outfit standing at my bedside.

"I've never seen a victim having to be sedated after being taken by the police." She said almost laughing. I could see my clothes on the table, realizing I was in a little dress thing.

"What's your name cutie pie?"

I blushed a little. I've never really talked to girl alone, or anyone for that matter. Ivan was always with me.

"Matthew…" I didn't look her in the eye. My eyes were still on my clothes. It was time to take my pills, I didn't want to skip a day and make Ivan mad.

"That's a cute name. My name's Elizaveta Hedervary, you can call me Dr Elizaveta." She winked at me. "Now, let's talk about your body." My face turned red. Why would I talk about my body with a stranger?

"Your body weight and muscle mass are both very low. Any idea why that is?" Why did that mean anything? I've always been on the skinny side.

"I…um…I've always been this way, um," I hesitated. But I need to take my pills. "Could you give me the bottle in my coat pocket, please?" I tried to be polite.

She took it out and looked at it. A worried look crossed her face.

"Who gives you these?"

"Ivan does, he said it's because my horrible childhood affects my body." The nurse shook her head and put the bottle on the table.

"I can't give you these, I don't know what they are or anything." She looked sad, and wrote something on a clipboard.

The door opened and a man in a suit walked in. He looked stern and had really big eyebrows. He talked to the nurse, who took my pills, and left the room.

He took a chair and sat next to the bed.

"Matthew, my name is Dr. Kirkland. I'm a therapist and there are some questions I need to ask you."

I didn't want to talk to a stranger. I just wanted to go home.

"Can't I just go home? I want to go back-" I was cut off by Dr. Kirkland who looks serious and unmovable.

"Matthew, you wont be going back to the house." He said calmly.

What!

No, this isn't right! I have to go back! This man couldn't be taking me away from Ivan!

"Ivan is the leader of a gang. He's wanted all over the world for many things."

These were all lies! Ivan is a good man. He saved me. I was crying now, angry anyone would say this about him.

"One of the new charges is kidnapping." Dr Kirkland took out a picture of a two small boys. One had a big grin and short blonde hair and the other was a smaller boy with longer blonde hair, and a shy smile. This was impossible! The other boy looked like...me.

"Matthew, do you know who this boy is." He pointed to the one that looked like me.

"It's….me."

To be continued.

**Author note. **

**Yep, I'm going to try to work in some more characters as the chapter goes on. **

Thanks for reading ^^ 


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N this is my first fanfics in years. Hope its okay**

**Summery: Matthew is sixteen and loves Ivan with all his heart. He can't remember any time he wasn't with him. Ivan is his everything. Matthew will do whatever his beloved says. But Matthew's small world is about to shaken up. Human!AU **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Hetalia **

Sunflowers in a box

Chapter 5

I couldn't believe my eyes. The boy in the picture was me, younger me. Dr. Kirkland watched me with a critical eye.

"Yes, Matthew it is you. Do you remember when this picture was taken?" I can't think. I didn't remember anything before I was ten. This was so confusing. But the man with the weird accent didn't stop talking.

"Matthew, do you know that other boy in this picture?" I didn't want any more questions. I was in a strange hospital, the nurse had taken my pills, and now this therapist was asking me strange questions.

"I don't know, I think..." I was so scared now; I didn't realize I was crying. The doctor's face lightened up a bit. He put his hand on mine.

"Matthew, there's someone I'd like you to meet." Dr Kirkland walked to the door and spoke to someone outside. A young blonde man walked in, his face was worried and nervous until our eyes locked. He ran to my side and wrapped me in his arms. I was shocked-I've never been hugged by anyone by Ivan. His hug was strong, but the man still seemed unsure. I wasn't sure what to do. He was crying. I struggled in his grasp.

Dr. Kirkland almost pulled the man off of me. The blonde man's face was covered in tears. He calmed a bit and knelt.

"...Do you know who I am?" He's voice was shaky and uneasy.

"I don't. I'm sorry" Who was this guy. I tried to look around the room, anywhere but his eyes.

The young man's eyes were still on me, full of tears.

"I'm your brother. My name's Alfred."

What! I didn't have a brother! It's impossible. The man was the boy in the picture, all grown up. "But I don't have a family. Ivan said so."

"Ivan lied to you. You had a loving family before he took you." Dr. Kirkland placed his hand my shoulder. My whole world seems to be a lie.

"I still remember that day you were taken." Alfred started. "We went to go play in the playground and our parents had told me to look after you, since you're younger then me. I wanted to play with the older kids but you were shy and wanted to stay on the playground. So I told you to stay there. You didn't want me to leave, but I did." Alfred got choked up. "After like an hour I walked back to the playground and you weren't there. I looked everywhere. But all I found was this." He holded out a little glove, it looked exactly like one Ivan had. He told me that it was mine when I was little, and that he had lost the left one.

And this one was the missing one. I held it in my hand, it even felt the same. It felt familiar and like home. For some reason I started to cry but I didn't know why. Alfred took this as a sign to pull me into another hug.

Dr. Kirkland and Alfred left the room soon after that. I could see them chatting outside. I got out of the bed and leaned to the door, trying to hear what they were saying.

"You can take him home, but I think it's a good idea for him to undergo therapy. You should bring him to my office. He shouldn't be left home alone until I'm sure he's mentally safe."

Dr. Kirkland said, still writing on his clipboard.

"Yeah, that's a good idea." Alfred seemed uneasy. "He's going to be okay, right Doc?" His eyes were on the floor.

"I don't know, I wouldn't know exactly how he'll be affected until I do more tests. Plus with the medicine he got Matthew on, I'm not even sure about the physical problem. Hopefully with some time and help from us he'll be able to heal."

I still didn't understand anything. Why did Ivan lie to me? Why did he take me away if I had a loving family?

The boor behind me opened, surprising Alfred and the doctor. "Oh, Matthew. You're probably tried of being in this room. Hey Doc, can I take Matthew home for the night?"

Alfred pulled me off the floor.

"Yes you can take him home but I would like him to come in for more tests." The man handed me my coat and led Alfred and I out of the little room to a large open space with lots of people. "I'll see you tomorrow then." With that Dr. Kirkland left us in the lobby.

"Well then, lets go home." Alfred smiled at me and took my hand. We were heading out when I heard someone say my name. I turned around to see Toris, Eduard and Ravis sitting there. Ravis was crying and shaking but he was smiling, hugging Eduard, who looked happy for the first time I've seen him. Toris was looking at me, looking in high spirits too.

"Matthew, is this your brother?" I had never seen Toris so cheerful.

"Yep that's me. You're the one who called the police." Alfred grabbed his hand and shook it. He had a big grin. " I want to thank you. If there's anything you need, I'd love to help you."

"No thank you sir, I'm just glad Matthew's safe now. We'll be okay." Toris smiled too, and turned to look at the others. "We're just happy it's over."

Toris looked at me. His face seemed at peace for the first time. "I hope you find happiness too Matthew. I want you to live a better life now." With that, he turned and waved good-bye to me.

As we left the hospital, I feel sad to be saying goodbye to Toris and the other two. I hoped they could find of good life. Alfred took me to a car and let me in.

As we drove, I realized how far we were from Ivan's house. This town was huge and there were people everywhere. This was making me nervous.

We pulled up to a building and he led me up a flight of stairs to a door. "Well I know it's not much, but it's home." The door led to a small apartment, which was a little messy.

"It's...fine." Alfred walked into the kitchen, doing something. He passed me a can of soda.

"Let me get you a room ready." He walked by a door to a small room. "I know it's a bit of a messy but it's all I've got." He said, making the small bed. I continued drinking my soda, not sure what to think at this point.

"Hey, Alfred, if you're my brother, where's our mom and dad?" I thought it was weird that they hadn't come to see me if I've been missing for six years.

Alfred grew quiet and stopped what he was doing. He turned to look at me; his face was painted with sadness.

"They're not coming. ….Mom and Dad passed away in a car crash three years ago."

For some reason this hurt. Tears started falling. Alfred took me into a hug again.

"They loved you Matthew. We never stopped trying to find you." Alfred was crying too.

Everything was falling apart. Ivan had lied to me, and now I didn't have him to make me feel better. I wasn't even sure if I should be missing him if he lied to me about everything.

I lay in the small unfamiliar bed, not being able to sleep. I could hear the cars driving past. Ivan's house was quiet and peaceful. I stared at the ceiling.

I slowly pushed open the door to the hallway. It was dark and kind of scary. I didn't know anything about this house. I found Alfred's bedroom was unlocked, so I opened the door. His room was a little bigger than mine, but a lot messier. He was in his bed. Alfred snored and moved slightly when I got on the bed. It was weird being in the same bed with someone besides Ivan. Alfred's breathing was different and his snore wasn't really showing.

My brother opened his eyes, slowly waking up. "Umm Mattie why are you here?" He said in a half asleep voice.

"I couldn't sleep, can I sleep with you please?" I asked, trying to use the face I used when I wanted Ivan to do something.

Alfred looked at me with sleepy eyes. "Yeah, Sure. Come on." He moved so I could move in closer. Being in bed with Alfred was different than being in bed with Ivan. Alfred didn't put the same amount of weight as Ivan did. He made funny faces when he was asleep. I giggled a bit, poking his face with my finger. He somehow didn't wake up. I looked up at the ceiling.

Everything was so different. I wonder if this is what the world is supposed to feel like.

I closed my eyes and tried to fall asleep.

Soon I was just as sleepy as my silly brother.

**To be continued **

**Thanks for reading. 3 The next chapter will be a lot longer.**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N this is my first fanfics in years. Hope its okay**

**Summery: Matthew is sixteen and loves Ivan with all his heart. He can't remember any time he wasn't with him. Ivan is his everything. Matthew will do whatever his beloved says. But Matthew's small world is about to shaken up. Human!AU **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Hetalia **

Sunflowers in a box

Chapter 6

_"Matthew, come here please!" Ivan called me into the room. He was holding a bag with a big smile on his face. I slipped into the room. _

_"Yes Ivan?" He was happy for some reason, and that meant good things for me. He opened the box and pulled out something red. It was a dress. Sometimes when Ivan goes and gets me clothes, he'll get me girly things. I used to hate it, but it makes Ivan so happy that I just got used to it. He pushed the dress into my arms._

_"Put it on now! I want to see." He said excitedly. I changed out of my normal clothes and put on the dress. It was short and puffy. It's low cut to show a woman's cleavage but since I was wearing it, it just showed a little bit of my chest. Looking in the mirror made me sad. I loved making Ivan happy, but I hated how much I looked like a girl. I have girly hips and thin legs. I was always skinny. I'm sure boys shouldn't look like me; even Ravis wasn't as thin as me, even if he was smaller. _

_Ivan's smile was so wide when he saw me in the dress. The look in his eyes kind of scared me. _

"_Does it look good?" I smiled. Ivan took me into his arms, giggling._

_"It looks amazing, мой подсолнечника" He locked lips with me and I wrapped my arms about his tight neck. Ivan picked me up and spun me around. Somehow we ended up on the bed, and stayed there for most of the day."_

I woke up to sound of pots and pans moving. The bed was empty. I stumbled out of bed and into the hallway. A delicious smell had filled the apearment. Sweet and warm. I wandered into the kitchen to find Alfred working on food.

"Morning Mattie! I didn't want to wake you."

I sat down at the table. The smell was intoxicating. What could make this aroma? Alfred placed a plate in front of me. There were these flat circles of cake-like things covered in a sticky liquid. So this is where the smell was coming from!

"They're pancakes, you used to eat them all the time when we were little." I took a bite of one.

I now know what true bliss is. These pancakes were the most amazing thing I've ever tasted. I devoured them in minutes. I had never had anything that good. Alfred ate a few too, and did the dishes.

"I have to take you to see Dr. Kirkland but I think we should get you some clothes to wear. Mine would be too big on you. We have to leave soon, so go ahead and get a shower." He pointed to the bathroom.

The bathroom was like everything else, tiny. I stared at the tub. It was different from the one at Ivan's house. I can't figure out how to turn it on. I stepped into the tub and pulled on the handle, but nothing happened. Why couldn't I turn on a simple tub? No matter how much I pulled nothing happened!

I got stressed and annoyed. I curled up on the bathroom floor. How did Ivan start the bath? I couldn't remember. Why was I like this!

"Hey, what's wrong?" Alfred pried open the door. He rushed into the room and pulled me up off the ground. "Are you having trouble starting the shower?" He turned the handle, and water started to flow out of the head. " There you go." he smiled at me. "You can use my stuff." He left the bathroom.

I stepped into the shower. It was smaller than I was used to. I tried to do what Ivan would do when he bathed me. I washed my body and hair and tried to rinse the soap out. Finally, when I thought I was clean, I turned the shower off.

A while later, Alfred started the car. "So Kirkland's office is only a few minutes away, but after that we're going to buy you some new clothes." he pulled out of the driveway.

I wasn't sure what to say to Alfred. I know he's my brother but I still don't feel like I know him at all.

"Alfred, how old are you?"

"Oh? I'm nineteen. I'm three years older then you." He kept his eyes on the road, but smiled at me a bit. It wasn't winter anymore. I noticed flowers starting to bloom. The city was much different than the small town. There were people walking back and forth. I had never seen this many people and cars.

We pulled up to a building with a sign that said "Kirkland Medical Facility". Alfred opened my door. I noticed that the office was decorated with lots of colors and lights. There were little animals painted on the walls.

Dr. Kirkland met us at the door. He led us down a hallway to his personal office.

"Dr. Kirkland why are these so many kids in there?" I asked.

"Well, this office handles cases of children and teens like yourself. We let patients stay here while their parents work. I'd like you to come here too while Alfred works." He smiled at me.

We sat down in a small room. Alfred looked almost nervous. I wonder why? Should I be nervous too?

"Well, the lab came back with results on what the pills were. It's a banned experimental drug. It's supposed to stop the aging process. It is, of course, illegal. That would explain why Matthew's weight is so low."

Was I really that skinny? I looked at Alfred, he had a bit of meat on him, he was taller then me too. I thought back to Toris and the others. Toris was thin but he did have a muscle on him. Ravis was short but even he wasn't as skinny as me.

"Do you know if it's possible to, you know, undo it?" Alfred's voice was sad. Dr. Kirkland shook his head.

"I don't know, it will take time. I'm going to do some tests to see where Matthew needs the most help." The doctor passed me some folders.

"What about school? He should be in high school right?" asked Alfred.

"Technically, his schooling stopped at the fifth grade. He's going to need tutoring." He paused. "I don't think he'll even be able to go to a normal school." Alfred's face was dark and heartbroken. I wasn't sure if I should be as sad as Alfred.

Alfred and the doctor talked some more while I had to do this really hard test. I didn't know any of these things.

"What's wrong Matthew?" Dr Kirkland looked up at me when I pushed the test away from me.

"I don't know any of it." I said sadly. I felt stupid. Why didn't I know these things?

"That's fine Matthew, it was just to find out where you were." He took the test away and placed it on his desk. "So, starting tomorrow you'll be coming here while Alfred works and goes to school. You'll be doing some tutoring and therapy. Plus you'll get to socialize with the other kids."

Alfred smiled at me and took my hand. It sounded all right. I wasn't sure how to feel about the whole thing. But the other kids here seemed happy.

We left the building and returned to the car. "Why don't we get something to eat before going shopping?" Honestly, I would have loved to just get some pancakes again, but Alfred insisted on taking me to a fast food restaurant.

The restaurant was filled with people. I had never seen so many people in one little building. Alfred insisted that the food here was amazing, so I stood with him. I had never really felt self-conscious about anything before. This was the first time I had felt with way, like every eye in the crowded room was on me. I got scared and grabbed onto Alfred's arm.

"Mattie? Are you okay?" He asked, looking down at me. I looked around at all the people. He put his arms around my shoulders. "It's fine Mattie. I'm here." I stayed close to him until we got our food and sat down.

The food wasn't near as delicious as the pancakes but it was all right. Alfred continued to talk and talk. I tried to listen, but I kept getting distracted by all the people in the restaurant. I had never been around so many people at once before.

"I guess I should have waited to take you out somewhere. You look really nervous." He said, breaking me out of my thoughts.

"There's just a lot of people here...that's all." I whispered. Alfred frowned and a few moments later we were back in the car.

Going shopping for clothes didn't go as Alfred planned. It seemed that there wasn't a lot of things that would fit me right.

"Medium's are too big around the waist and hips but smalls are too short on you...I have no idea what to try next." Alfred said after I had tried on the fifth pair of pants. He had been trying, but nothing seemed to fit right.

While Alfred continued looking I noticed that the guys shopping around us had a different body type than me.

No wonder I didn't fit in any of these clothes! I noticed how different I looked from Alfred even though we were brothers. I looked in the mirror of the dressing room we were in. I had never noticed how scrawny I looked.

"Excuse me, do have any other sizes? None of these sizes fit my brother." Alfred asked one of the ladies working there.

"Did you try a small?" She said barely looking at him.

"Yes. The pant legs are too short. And in medium size, the pants are too big. Do you have anything else?" The lady sort of rolled her eyes. She looked me up and down and her face went from annoyed to cruel.

"I don't think anything will fit him." She looked like she just saw something gross. Alfred had seen this too and wasn't happy about it. "Why don't you try the junior girls section?" The woman said haughtily. Alfred grabbed my hand.

"No thank you." With that we walked away from her. Alfred was greatly frustrated as he simply grabbed the medium pants and went to the cash register. I was embarrassed and felt bad that Alfred had to deal with that. "I don't want you to have to wear girls clothes. You are a boy after all. "

Waiting in line, I saw something I really wanted. It was a big, comfy looking red sweatshirt. I left Alfred's side to go look and touch it. It was really soft, and felt like a nice warm blanket. All the sides were too big for me but I wanted one. It was my favorite color, red.

"Hey Mattie, do you like that one?" Alfred asked from behind me. He looked a little less stressed then before. I nodded at it. "Then I'll get you one."

By the time we were back in the car I already had the sweatshirt on. It was warm and comfy. I reminded me of being in Ivan's house. It felt safe.

I ended up falling asleep in Alfred's car.

**To be continued. **

**I hope you guys liked this chapter. ^^ Thanks for reading **

**Sorry if you got the another email about this chapter. I uploaded the wrong chapter. ^^'**


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N this is my first fanfics in years. Hope its okay**

**Summery: Matthew is sixteen and loves Ivan with all his heart. He can't remember any time he wasn't with him. Ivan is his everything. Matthew will do whatever his beloved says. But Matthew's small world is about to shaken up. Human!AU **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Hetalia **

Sunflowers in a box

Chapter 7

I wasn't sure if I liked or not. He seemed nice but asked a lot of questions I didn't like.

I was sitting in his office a few days after, in my new favorite sweatshirt, while he finished some paperwork.

"Matthew...there's something I wanted to ask you about." said the British man. I looked up at him. His face was very stern and it scared me.

"How was your relationship with Ivan?" He was questioning me again.

"He took care of me...we were in love." I smiled, thinking about Ivan.

"But he lied to you, do you still love him?" Arthur moved closer to me.

"I don't know why he lied to me...but I still love him." Of course I still loved Ivan. Him and I were in love. Even if he lied to me.

"What did you and Ivan do?" he asked.

"We'd spend most of our time together. We played a lot." I felt restless talking about Ivan; the look on Dr. Kirkland's face didn't help.

"Play? How did you play with Ivan?"

"Oh, the usual stuff." I smiled, looking at the ground. Why did Arthur want to know about this?

.

"Where did you play with Ivan?"

"In our bedroom, after our bath." I said. I was trying hard to not look Dr. Kirkland in the eye.

"Matthew...what did you and Ivan do?" he placed his hand on my shoulder. It started to stress me out. I didn't want to talk about it.

"I told you, normal stuff." I turned, as I won't be looking him in the eye.

"Matthew.. Did Ivan ever hurt you when you played with him?" he asked

"No! Ivan would never hurt me! He loved me!" I yelled, pushing myself out of my chair and walking to the window. Why would he suggest that Ivan would hurt me! Ivan protected me, and took care of me!

"He lied to you Matthew, about almost everything." He walked up to me and put a hand on my back. "And I know he hurt you because the doctors looked you over when we first found you. They found proof that he hurt you. What he did was wrong."

I pushed him away from me. "No! I told you Ivan didn't hurt me! We were in love!" I yelled, starting to sob.

"Matthew, what he did to you wasn't love, it was rape. You don't understand." I sank down to the floor and curled up, crying and angry.

"You're a liar. Ivan loves me. I don't know what you're talking about!" I covered my ears to stop hearing Dr. Kirkland. "Just leave me alone!"

He stood there for a moment, and then he left the room to greet Alfred at the door. He was there to pick me up, at the end of the day. I had never wanted to leave sooner.

I left without saying good-bye to the doctor. had told Alfred why I was so upset. The car ride home was quiet; I was still irritated about it.

"Listen, was just trying to help." Alfred said, as we pulled up to our home.

I didn't talk to him; I just got out of the car. As I walked up the stairs, I ran into someone.

I almost fainted when the man turned around. He was probably the scariest man I had ever seen. I thought he was going to kill me.

"Um…I'm sorry…um."

I started to try and move down the stairs slowly.

"Berwald, you're scaring him." A voice came for behind the horrifying man. He was much smaller and friendlier looking. "I've never seen you before. What's your name?"

I didn't answer. I was too distracted by the larger man staring down at me. His eyes seemed to burn into my soul.

"Tino, sorry he's my brother." Alfred said, coming up for behind me. "How are you two?" he asked, grinning.

" Oh, I didn't know you had a brother." said Tino. Alfred started talking with the smaller man while I stood there, with the taller man still staring at me.

"Well, it was nice seeing you Alfred, and it was nice meeting you Matthew." The couple walked away and into their apartment.

"They're our neighbors, Tino and Berwald. Oh, and don't worry about Berwald. He's always like that." Alfred was laughing, and elbowing me.

"He's always that scary!" I asked as we got in the apartment.

"Yeah, he is." He laughed. Alfred started dinner while I just lied on the couch. I ended up drifting off.

_"Matvey, why is your face so red?" I was lying in bed, my head spinning and my whole body was hot. Ivan was standing over me, and he placed his hand on my forehead. _

"_I think you're sick. Toris, go get me a wet rag and make Matvey some soup." Ivan's voice boomed through the room as Toris rushed out to do as he was told. _

"_I'm going to make you feel better, __мой подсолнечника." Ivan moved to sit on the bed next to me. He wrapped his arms about me, cuddling with me. He kissed my burning cheeks. _

"_Stop…you'll get sick too..." I mumbled, trying to push away. Ivan just chuckled and grinned. He moved in closer to me. _

"_I don't get sick, Matvey." I was around the age of fourteen. Ivan was nibbling on my neck. I moaned slightly. "I'll take care of you forever, мой подсолнечника. No one will ever take you away from me, and if they tried, I'd kill them."_

_At the time, it had seemed like a lovely comment. _

"Mattie! You going to eat or no?" Alfred called me from the kitchen. I slowly awoke from my flashback.

"Alfred…I don't feel well." I leisurely walked over to the table where Alfred was sitting. He looked up at me. My brother placed his hand on my forehead.

"You don't feel hot, I don't think you're sick." He looked at me intensely. I sat down at the table. "Maybe you're just tired. You should go to sleep after dinner."

I picked a little off my plate." Can I sleep in your bed tonight?" I asked. I still didn't like sleeping alone.

"I don't know Mattie. said it's better for you to sleep in your own bed." He said sadly. Great. even had Alfred on his side. The bed in the guest room was still unfamiliar and I didn't like it. Even if Alfred snored loudly, I was more comfortable in bed with someone else.

After dinner, I ended up in my own bed. Alfred refused to let me sleep in his bedroom anymore. I laid restless in the bed, unable to fall asleep. I pulled out something from the drawer.

The sunflower necklace Ivan gave me. They hadn't taken it from me. The police had kept the clothes I was wearing at Ivan's house, and had never returned it. I held the necklace close to my heart.

Later that night I still couldn't sleep and was sweating up a storm. It wasn't even hot in my room. I wasn't even sure why, but I started crying, and felt nauseas. My heart was pounding.

What's wrong with me? I felt like I was dying. Flashes of the house, of Ivan, played in my head.

_"мой подсолнечникa." _

I was filled with dread. I didn't know why, but going back scared me. Going back to Ivan scared me.

"ALFRED!" I started screaming and yelling for my brother. The door was pushed open and Alfred came running in.

"What's wrong? Matthew?" He ran to my bedside and grabbed me. I was shaking and weeping. He pulled me into a hug. "It's okay, I'm here. I'm here."

I never did get to sleep that night. Alfred stayed by me the whole night.

We went to early the next day. He told me I had had a panic attack and that it was normal for persons who had post traumatic stress disorder, and panic disorder. He told me there isn't much we can do about it without medicating me, and that it's a part of my disorder.

I didn't really understand it. But Alfred kept saying we could work around it. He left for work, leaving me with .

"This is probably my fault. I shouldn't have pushed you that far." The Brit said, almost to himself.

We ended up talking about my panic attack and how I felt during it. But of course, the Doctor tried to get me to talk about the house again. "Matthew, what's the earliest moment of living there you have?"

I thought. I didn't remember much from my early days with Ivan. I sat down in the chair. The memory was hazy.

_It was a cold day and it chilled me down to the bone. I was for some reason sitting in the kitchen. I was small; the chair was too big for me. Ivan and Toris were sitting across from me. They both looked worried. _

_"__Matvey, please eat something. Little one, you're so small, you need to eat." Ivan stuck a fork in my face. I sank down in the chair, crying and pushing his hand away. _

_"No! Leave me alone." I cured in a ball. I was so scared and upset. Ivan picked me up, I struggled and screamed. "Stop!" he had me on his lap, and patted my head._

_"Little one, please stop fighting, you have to eat, you're so thin." He tried again to get me to eat the weird food. I closed my mouth tightly, and turned away from him. As soon as I did, Ivan took my chin in his hand and pulled it towards him. "Toris, you try. I'll hold him."_

_Toris moved in front of Ivan and I. "Ivan, I don't think this is helping. You're just scaring him." I was still fighting, but Ivan held me strongly in his arms, not letting me move. _

_"Toris, look at how thin he is. He needs to eat." With that, Toris sighed, and put the fork up to my mouth. Even though Trois didn't scare me, I still didn't want to eat. _

_"Maybe you should get the funnel." Ivan said to Toris. I was filled with terror at the thought of being force fed like that. I started crying more. I was starving, but I looked at the strange food with fear. Before Ivan got the funnel, I reached to the plate. _

_"Oh! Now you're going to get. Good, little one." He handed a fork to me and I took the bite. Ivan seemed happy as I ate more and more, rubbing my head. "You're so small and cute." I felt uncomfortable being pushed up against Ivan's tall, big body. _

Remembering that made me gloomy. I ended up crying. Dr. Kirkland was sympathetic, and put his hand on my shoulder.

Was I wrong? Was Ivan a bad person? How much else was a lie?

**To be continued **

**Longest chapter yet huh? : ) I hope you all like it.**

**I love all the wonderful reviews I'm getting. **

**By the way, the last flashback is one of the first moments of Matthew captive**

**around the age of 10. It was before he was "brainwashed" by Ivan. **

**He doesn't remember a lot from that time which is why he just thought of that. **

_**More to come~**_


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N this is my first fanfics in years. Hope its okay**

**Summery: Matthew is sixteen and loves Ivan with all his heart. He can't remember any time he wasn't with him. Ivan is his everything. Matthew will do whatever his beloved says. But Matthew's small world is about to shaken up. Human!AU **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Hetalia **

Sunflowers in a box

Chapter 8

Weeks slowly passed as and Alfred spent most of their time questioning me about how I was feeling. Alfred finally let me sleep in his bed with him. It made me more comfortable.

Dr. Kirkland set up a doctor's appointment with Dr. Elizaveta . She came to Kirkland Medical Facility to see me. She was cheerful, and smiled at me.

"So how have you been? Kirkland said you had a panic attack the other day." She checked my breathing. "How have you been feeling? Anything since then?"

"No, I've been fine." I liked Elizaveta. She was nice. I noticed a ring on her finger.

"Mrs. Elizaveta, are you married? Aren't you young to married?"

She laughed. "Yes, I'm married. I'm only 20, so yes, I am young." She checked my ears and eyes. "I graduated early from school to become a doctor, and then I got married soon after."

"Do you have any kids?"

"No, not yet. Why don't you step onto the scale so we can see your weight?" I did as she said, and stepped on the scale. She checked all the numbers. But she frowned. "It looks like you haven't put on any weight."

I frowned as well Alfred and Dr. Krikland had been making me eat in hope that I'd put on some weight. It had been a few months, and I hadn't put on any weight. I wanted to, because I still looked like a girl with the body I have now.

She left after talking with Dr. Kirkland leaving me sitting in the office when he came back in the room.

"Well Matthew, we'll have to work harder to get you to gain some weight. There are some pills I can give you and see if that works" He sat down across from me. " I did want to ask you one more thing before you went home." His serious face came out.

"Matthew, what is the most painful memory you have of Ivan?"

That stopped me in my tracks.

_I was lying in the bedroom late at night. Ivan had been out all day and I was all alone. It was cold and dark as I tried to fall asleep. I curled up in a ball in the big bed we shared. _

_The door opened slowly and filled the room with light. Ivan stepped in and started getting undressed sloppily. _

"_Ivan.." I rose from the bed to see Ivan. He seemed different tonight. _

"_Oh...Good evening мой подсолнечника." He moved slowly over to the bed. There was something off about Ivan. The look in his eyes was different; it's wasn't loving or sweet like his normal face. _

"_I want to play… Let's play мой подсолнечника." He climbed on the bed and on top of me. He started kissing my neck and face. I smelled vodka all over him._

_Ivan was drunk again. _

_He often came home intoxicated after going out. He oftentimes became blissful, and giggled about everything. He would accidentally knock things over and later blame it on someone else. I was usually asleep when he was drunk. But anything could and would set him off. _

_Ivan stared working my shirt, unbuttoning clumsily. The kisses became sloppy too._

"_Мой маленький__подсолнух__, который делает __все, что я__говорю.__Я люблю тебя.__"_

_He whispered in my ear. Ivan always speaks in Russian when drunk, so I didn't understand what he was saying, which kind of scared me. My sleep shirt was thrown to the ground while Ivan stared branding my chest with his kisses. The smell of vodka pushed into my senses. He's grin got wider. "__Мой идеальный маленький подсолнечника." _

_Ivan pushed my pants off, throwing them on the ground. Before I could do anything Ivan was already working on his pants. He almost always prepared me before playing like this. But it seemed like Ivan was too preoccupied to remember. _

"_Ivan, aren't you going to-" I stopped talking when Ivan grabbed my wrist tightly. _

"_Hush." there was no way to get away or talk him out of it. _

_It felt like hours until the game ended._

_Ivan would never remember it in the morning. He would wake me up smiling and whispering sweet nothings into my ears. I didn't tell him. I would try to keep in my tears, as Ivan would turn over to cuddle with me._

_I would do my best to pretend nothing was wrong after nights like that._

I didn't want to talk after that. It made too many painful memories. Dr. Kirkland didn't make me talk about anything for the rest of day. I ended up crying for most of the afternoon until Alfred showed up and took me home.

Trying to make me feel better, my brother made me pancakes for dinner. It helped a little, but not enough.

"So, your birthday is coming up. We should have a party." He said with a smile. I looked up at him curiously.

"Yeah?" I knew my birthday was the first of the month, but I wasn't sure about the party.

"Do you remember having a birthday party?" I shook my head. "Then that's more of a reason to have one!" Alfred kept talking about said birthday party. I just ate my pancakes, nodding and laughing along with him.

To be continued

**Author note**

**Sorry this chapter is so short. QAQ **

**These only one more chapter left and it'll be much longer. **

**Translation note**

**Мой маленький подсолнух, который делает все, что я говорю. Я люблю тебя-My little sunflower who does everything I say. I love you**

**Мой идеальный маленький подсолнечника-My perfect little sunflower**


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N this is my first fanfics in years. Hope its okay**

**Summery: Matthew is sixteen and loves Ivan with all his heart. He can't remember any time he wasn't with him. Ivan is his everything. Matthew will do whatever his beloved says. But Matthew's small world is about to shaken up. Human!AU **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Hetalia **

Sunflowers in a box

Chapter 9

Alfred continued talking about the party for the next few days, making plans and such.

I just smiled along with him, unsure yet of how to feel. The thought of the party did seem like fun. Alfred invited the two doctors and plus the neighbors, Tino and Berwald.

Him and I decorated the house with birthday signs and balloons. Alfred had bought a big cake with "Happy Birthday" written on it in red.

The guests begin to show up. First were the neighbors, Tino and Berwald. They brought a box, which Alfred put on the table.

"Happy Birthday Matthew." Tino said with a smile. Berwald seemed to smile too, but it was hard to tell.

The next to show up was Arthur. Alfred greeted him. It was weird to see him out of the office, and even weirder to see him in anything other then a suit. Him and Alfred started talking. I had never really seen Alfred and the British doctor talk about anything other than me. But they were chatting about other things, like Alfred's work.

Elizaveta showed up after that with her husband, who I had never met before. He seemed all right, kind of the stuffy type. He spoke with and Alfred.

Alfred brought out the large cake and had me blow out the candles. Everyone sang a song and cut the cake and shared it. Everyone was laughing, and smiling. It was a happy place. "Happy Birthday!" Everyone cheered at the same time. The cake was delicious. Everyone spoke and seemed to have a great time. Alfred was still getting friendly with Doctor Kirkland, who had been more talkive as well.

After the cake, my brother had me sit in the living room and I was supposed to open the gifts. Tino and Berwald had bought me some new DVD's. Elizaveta had given me a new game.

Doctor Kirkland had given me a few books, and even some new clothes. "Wow, you have good taste, Arthur." Alfred said, smiling at the doctor and patting him on the back.

"Alright, I saved the best for last." Alfred pulled out a big blue box and passed it too me.

"This one's from your amazing bro." He said with a wink. I opened it, and found something white and fluffy inside.

It was a stuffed polar bear. It was white as snow and had a sleepy look in it's eyes. It was posed like it was sitting.

"I know it's a bit girly," Alfred started.

"No! I like it." It felt safe and homely, having in my arms.

The party soon came to an end and the guests started to leave. Alfred and I cleaned up the living room and kitchen. I even got do the dishes.

"Damn, we're out of paper towels. I'm going to go pick some up at the store really quick." Alfred said, grabbing his keys. "Are you going to be okay by yourself for a few minutes?"

"I'll be fine." I assured him, and he rushed out the door.

I had never been in the house alone before. In fact I don't remember being alone anywhere. Without Alfred in the house it was so quiet. I took the stuffed polar bear and walked to my room. I placed my new friend on my bed, when I noticed something on my window. I opened it to see a flower with a ribbon tied on it and a note attached.

It was a sunflower.

_Dear мой подсолнечника,_

_I wanted to wish you a Happy Birthday. I want to hold you again soon. There are evil people trying to keep me away from you, but I have many ways of getting to you. I can't say when, but I will come back for you. Nothing can keep me away forever. _

_Your Dear, Ivan._

My hands stared to shake, and I lost all of my breath. I unlocked one of my drawers, where I kept Ivan's necklace, and stuffed both the letter and flower in there, and slammed it shut. I moved over to my bed and sank in to it.

Ivan knew where I was. He knew where I lived. He could come get me at any moment...

Tears started falling from my eyes, I wanted to just disappear. I sat there crying and shaking alone in my room. I didn't know what to do. What if Ivan did come back for me? What would I do?

I heard the front door open but I couldn't move, feeling like I was chained down to the floor, my voice was completely gone.

"Matthew? Where are you? Matthew?" Alfred called through the apartment. I wanted to yell to him, but all that came out of month was a sob. He moved to my door and opened it.

"Matthew! What's wrong? What happened?" He ran to my side. I couldn't say anything. I couldn't tell him that Ivan knew where I was. I couldn't do that to my brother.

He hugged me, trying to get me to calm down. "It's okay Matthew, I'm here."

Finally my voice came back. "Don't leave me alone!" I blubbered out. "I don't want to be alone." The tears didn't stop. I just cried into the chest of my brother.

It take a few minute for me to stop crying and calm down. Alfred and I just sat there.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry I wasn't there to protect you." Alfred had started to cry as well.

"If I hadn't left you alone in the park that day you would have been safe. I should have protected you. I should have been a better brother."

I hugged Alfred tighter. "You're a great brother." I looked up at him. "Don't you ever wish you had a brother that was…normal?"

I knew I wasn't normal.

"What?" Alfred looked shocked that I had asked it. "You're my brother, no matter strange or 'normal'. I love you no matter what." He embraced me again. "And we're going to make a better life for you, I promise."

I want to live my life here, and get better. I feel bad for causing Alfred all this pain.

I'm scared of what Ivan is going to do when he does decide to take me back.

I don't want to go back to him. More and more, I'm finding out how evil and hurtful the things he did to me were.

I want to stay here with Alfred and and everyone else.

Alfred and I finally went to bed. I stared up at the ceiling, hugging on to the polar bear, while Alfred snored on.

I wondered what would happen to me next.

**The end. **

**Author note-**

**Before anyone says anything let me say this...**

**There WILL be a sequel.**

**The reason this one only has 9 chapters is because I wanted to be able to split it up, that way I can change the writing style to 1****st**** person to 3****rd**** person, the way I want it to be. Also the main pairing will change to PruCan. Ivan will still be there, but I haven't planned yet when and where he'll be showing back up. **

**I hope you'll read the sequel. ^^ **

**Thanks for reading. **

**P.S, I'd like to thank all the reviewers, whose kind words compel me to continue uploading my fanfics. Also, my lovely beta, Chanduril, for checking my grammar and spelling. Thank you all, again :) **


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